Moving.

It is strange and nice to discover you’ve got friends you didn’t realize they were your friends. I mean, I’ve been so lucky this month. When I left my old home, with nothing in my hands and nowhere to go, some of my workmates offered me a place to live while I was looking for a new flat. I have to say I was pleasantly surprised. So, for the last month I’ve been living in a house that one of my workmates offered me. She doesn’t live there, so I had a little house in the country for my own, for as long as I needed it.

Yesterday I took all the rest of my things to my new flat, so I said goodbye to that house that’s been my home (for free!) for more than one month. I am so grateful to her. I’m not a very sociable person, and I don’t know how to tell her how grateful I am, but I will try to find the way. The funny thing of this is that I didn’t consider this workmate as a true friend. But she’s really surprised me. This kind of surprise is just so nice. It makes you trust in mankind.

All of my things are in my new flat now. Inside cardboard boxes, but all of them are in my new flat. It’s a nice feeling. I’m going to have some financial problems to afford the rent, but it’s worth it. It’s the only thing I can do. I can’t buy a flat. I can imagine the banker’s guffaw if I tried to ask for a mortgage. But now I have my own little flat for my own, and I’m starting a brand-new life. It’s so scary anyway.

And I’ve got my lovely Scottish smile I could never get tired to see. But that is also scary. Good but scary. Sometimes I feel so nervous when I think of him. It’s such a strange feeling. His smile, his eyes, his hands… everything makes me tremble. And I know he will probably read what I’m writing, but I don’t mind. I just need to say it. I feel afraid of what’s happening, but I don’t want to think too much about that. I know I need to relax and enjoy the way.

Sometimes it is so difficult to enjoy our lives…